Automanic

They are yellow and black and buzz around the city like they own it .No, I'm not talking about bees but the omnipresent auto-rickshaws a.k.a rick,auto,tuk-tuk,rickshaw and the list
goes on.Every auto has a life of its own which largely depends on the captain of the ship i.e., the auto driver.
Taking an auto is almost inevitable in Bangalore and I have hopped into one atleast a hundred million times.I dont usually chat up auto drivers as I dont like to distract anyone on the
job but I have been forced out of my comfortable silence (sometimes jolted) to give directions or to ask them to slow down and once even to tell the driver that the seat had fallen
off(This did happen. I swear on my precious pairs of shoes!!).
The driver of an auto I once took kept speaking out his thoughts.I have seen a lot of people do this and I suspect I do it at times too, only it got a little too scary when he started singing his thoughts. That was definitely a first for me.What if he was some kind of a singing assassin!!!??I was in no mood to find out.He scared me enough to get down a whole kilometre before my destination.
There was another instance where the auto driver was in a hurry for no apparent reason.It was like he had to get me/my dead body to my destination in the shortest possible time.What
followed was a honk/brake/overtake/swear/spit fest.People were honked/spat at for just being on the roads at the same time as we were.It appeared as if he enjoyed getting all worked up and
yelling at people, maybe it made his job more fulfilling.When I did finally get off I couldn't resist myself from asking him if he used to drive an ambulance previously to which he just
smiled. I was totally disarmed as I had been mentally gearing up for a full blown fight with him.
All auto drivers test the waters by speaking to you in all possible languages.This is to see if you are someone who can be "taken for a ride" or not.All of them will invariably never return change.Some of them have to be told which route to take failing which you will have to take the longest and most circuitous route to your destination and some will take offence
if you try to be navigator supreme.And forget getting an auto when it rains.They will not come anywhere you wish to go even if you give them all the money in the world.On the other hand
if you are lost ask an auto driver for directions.They will be spot on.You have to hand it to these guys. The art of "direction giving" comes naturally to them.Some of these guys have hearts of gold .I have seen a lot of auto drivers giving free rides to school kids and they usually pitch in first at the scene of an accident.
Hmmm Autos!!! Can't live with them, Cant live without them.